Guess what? I started working on this again! Not much, since I’m not exactly swimming in free time here, but enough that I’ve finally finished Chapter One.
[Person in the back row raises hand]
Yes?
“What do you mean by finished chapter one? I thought you finished it last May?”
No I didn’t.
“Yes. Yes you did. You posted it right here.”
Oh. Haha. Well, look at that! So I did.
Whelp, that’s just how writing works. The author throws a bunch of words on the page, liberally slashes away at them with a red pen, and then replaces them with more different words. But I’ll get into that process more next week.
While this is my second public revision of the chapter, in reality, it’s probably the 117th version of it. Because I’m just. that. good.
So what’s different? A lot, actually. As I resumed working on the manuscript in early September, I realized the opening fell short in a number of areas. I didn’t give enough background to the protagonist. I didn’t hint enough as to why he was on this old lane. And I gave no hints at all what was inside the bookshop.
To that end, I pulled up a big section from Chapter Seven into the first chapter. Mostly, I couldn’t shake the feeling that the reader shouldn’t have to wait that long to see what was inside the shop.
I hope it’s better. One of the next steps will be to take this back to Scribophile and let them tear it apart offer constructive criticism. In the meantime, you can read it right away:
Featured Image Photo Credit: Henry Be
Glenna
My passion for all things English had me enjoying the colorful thoughtfulness put into all of the description. It seems timeless, so I didn’t recognize a period of time. Sorry I’m not much of a fan of fantasy though and must leave that to others, however, the chapter is intriguing and leaves your reader at the perfect place. All of this in my humble opinion. I am a graduate in Social Psychology… not English! (I grub up on British detective stories set in modern day.) Best of luck in your writing. Write the whole book.
Charlie
Ironically, I had a line in there where I gave the exact date: Thursday, October 1, 2020. When I first came up with the story in 2013, that seemed so far in the future. Now it’s just a little over a year from now. The very next chapter, however, begins with “About two and a half years earlier, one sunny April morning in 2018…” But that’s a little long to keep the reader feeling out of place temporally.
Thanks for stopping by!
Cathy
I just read both chapters and I loved it! Usually I’m not drawn in as quickly into a story as I was with this one. Is there more that I can read? Very good!
Charlie
Chapter 3 will be uploaded on October 4. Thanks for reading!